There are things in one’s life that you would prefer to avoid.
You know things like having toilet paper on your shoe while walking in public… or realizing too late that you can see through the shirt you’ve been wearing all day.
Normal things you know. Stuff you look out for. Walking out of a public bathroom… must check shoes. Looking into a mirror at outfit… oh my too scandalous!
Then there are those things that happen that are so absurd they are beyond prevention. Things that you cannot prevent because who would ever think that that could happen to someone.
These things usually happen to me.
Let me set the scene:
It is the week after New Years and the gym is PACKED. Top floor and bottom floor are both littered with sweaty human beings.
I am not one of those people that particularly likes being around a lot of people when I work out. I do not strut my stuff at the gym. I do not make eye contact. I just want to get in and get out.
Although I will say I do make a conscious effort to smile and keep my head up so I do not look like a miserable person, but overall I like to be invisible.
When we get to the gym, Taylor (my hubby) and I split up for a bit. I take off to go upstairs and do some cardio. He wanders somewhere unbeknownst to me. We spend about thirty minutes a part. I walk across the gym, go upstairs, walk around, find a stair stepper… and do that for a bit.
When I am done with my cardio, I go downstairs to the weight section to find Taylor. We walk around the weight room while Taylor explains to me exercises we are going to do. After a bit we decide to do bench press. I go first. I sit down and pathetically attempt to do that exercise. When I am done I stand up and hear something that no one ever expects to hear while at the gym.
Taylor, in a completely monotone voice (he is all business at the gym), informs me:
“Shelbi you have a diaper stuck to your butt.”
Silence. It takes a moment to register. I look around the room at all the people. I feel around and sure enough… there it is. A size 3 diaper.
Yes fellow humans. I strutted my stuff around the ENTIRE gym with a diaper stuck to my butt. AND NO ONE SAID ANYTHING TO ME.
It’s not like a diaper is small. Not to mention my pants were black, and the diaper was white. I even used some of the machines with my butt facing the walkway and nothing… no heads up. No “Excuse me fellow Mom, but you have a diaper on your hind quarters.”
I can’t even care anymore.
So… Hey my name is Shelbi and in case you haven’t noticed I am a Mom who has kids in diapers.