So the other day I thought all day about a conversation I had with a mother whose children are grown.
Here is my paraphrase:
“I really think your generation of mothers has it harder than we did. With social media you guys can see what is going on in each others lives and that really gives way to the urge to compare. You are bombarded with images and expectations making it so hard to be content.”
Pinterest makes my mind explode. Mother guilt about all the crafty things I should do GALORE. Keeping up with the Jones’s.. pshhh. Keeping up with about 78495386725409245 people who show their highlights everyday.
Twitter. Instagram. Facebook. Pinterest. Blogspot. WordPress. Snapchat. That google thing I know nothing about…
Do not get me wrong. I love seeing the wonderful things going on in peoples lives. I think it is a slippery slope when we get into blaming social media for our own lack of contentment. There is nothing new under the sun. There has been and will always be someone richer, smarter, skinnier, healthier, craftier, etc… in this world. Jealousy, coveting, and greed are not new feelings. Comparing with others is not a new thing. In this age of social media we just get to be bombarded with other people’s information on the daily so sometimes I think it makes it harder to control our thought lives.
It is so important that we do not covet that God even threw it into the Ten Commandments. It is that unhealthy.
“You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.”- Exodus 20:17
So I do not think I will be coveting my neighbors ox and donkey anytime soon, but man this verse totally gets me.
Do I covet my neighbors house?
Do I covet my neighbors wife?
Sometimes.. she is much better at this wife and mom thing. And look at that bod… I bet when she goes to the beach she doesn’t wear a shirt over her bathing suit like a chubby preteen at summer camp.
I mean I could go on.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
I think every one needs to grab that quote and sit on it.
We can have our joy stolen, but we can also steal others joy. You know when something really great happens for someone and you react with that sour look because you totally wish something wonderful would happen to you? How selfish are we when we covet?
SELFISH. SELF-CENTERED. AWFUL.
I have seen woman relationships ruined because of the evil that is coveting.
Comparison is the THIEF of joy.
Do you want your joy stolen? I certainly do not.
Do you want to steal other people’s joy? Oh no.
So let’s do this. Let’s be grateful for what we do have and be happy for others. And remember, on all these social media sites, you are seeing the best parts of people’s lives. We show the nice parts that we want people to see. And that is wonderful. I want to see the good parts. The bad parts are reserved for one-on-one conversations, personal friendships, or maybe for a carefully worded blog meant to inspire 😉
So one last time say it with me:
I WILL STOP COMPARING OTHER PEOPLE’S HIGHLIGHT REELS TO MY BEHIND THE SCENES.
And if you are really struggling with coveting and comparing because of social media… Get off the internet for awhile. Your husband will thank you. Your children will thank you. Your friends will thank you. And your heart will thank you.
Whew. Sorry I went off on a tangent there.
Here I will make you feel better and show you some of my “behind the scenes”.
How I feel when:
1. When Baby has eaten yet another piece of paper out of a book because I looked away for too long:
2. Trying to put a diaper or any item of clothing on Baby:
3. When it is 3 am and Baby won’t go back to sleep:
4. When I have to do long overdue housework:
5. When I have just finished all the laundry… and I find more:
6. When I have been dieting all day and my husband brings home cookies:
7. When I am telling someone something about baby, my marriage, or anything really, and they respond with “Oh.. just you wait” and proceed to tell me all about all the knowledge and experience I do not have and they do have:
8. When Baby will not take a nap:
9. After my husband gets home and I hand him our child who has decided not to sleep all day:
10. How I felt about any TV shows about childbirth right after I gave birth: